Greetings royal fans, it’s your favorite royal critic back again with the hottest royal gossip. We’ve got a doozy of a story for you all today—Harry and Meghan’s controversial trip to Colombia has more layers of drama than a royal wedding cake! Now usually I enjoy keeping up with our favorite former royals, but this latest excursion has me asking more questions than the Riddler. Let’s break down what exactly went down on this so-called “charitable tour.”

To start, local Colombian officials are fuming over the exorbitant costs of providing security for Harry and Meghan’s trip. We’re talking billions of pesos spent on over 3000 police officers, soldiers, helicopters, bomb disposal units, and even a guard with a bulletproof shield in case of sniper fire. Now I get royalty needs protection, but this is straight up absurd. Were they visiting Colombia or filming the next James Bond flick?

As the backlash grew, everyone started pointing fingers faster than you can say “the Queen is culpable.” The Colombian VP tried to claim they didn’t foot the whole bill, while international agencies and the government supposedly chipped in for “technical requirements.” Yeah right, because having a small private army is definitely a technicality.

But the biggest question remains—where exactly did Harry and Meghan’s supposed funds for this trip come from? My sneaking suspicion is their “charitable” Archewell Foundation foot the bill, which would be a huge ethical issue. A charity funding luxury travel for its founders? That’s eyebrow raising to the point of launching into orbit, folks.

And what was even the purpose of this trip? Supposedly it was to “encourage tourism and investment.” Please. If they really wanted to showcase Colombia, they would have highlighted the stunning natural beauty, vibrant culture, and more. Instead, all they did were some school visits, performances, and taught a social media class. Since when does learning Instagram strategies count as vital aid to a developing nation?

It just seems like Harry and Meghan wanted to play dress up royal without any of the responsibility. They couldn’t hack it as working royals but sure can’t seem to give up the perks. It’s having your cake and eating it too! Meanwhile, real working royals like Princess Anne and the Wales are actually making a difference without absurd security details. That’s what service is about—not fancy photos ops.

But the real victims here are the Colombian people. While Harry and Meghan paraded around in designer clothes, that money could have funded so many meaningful community programs and helped those truly in need. All to teach social media skills? Give me a break. This trip was nothing more than a PR stunt to boost their own brand under the guise of “charity.”

Now some of you may argue they were “raising awareness,” but awareness of what exactly? Themselves and their lavish lifestyles? This whole thing reeks of using developing nations as props rather than genuinely caring about their welfare. It’s disappointing to see someone with their resources prioritizing PR over people.

To Harry and Meghan I say, put your money where your mouth is. Do charity work for its own sake, not photo ops. Represent causes without all the pomp and grandeur. And stop using nations as backdrops—the people of Colombia deserve real support, not a fleeting visit from pretend royals in designer duds.

It’s time for an honest reflection. Are they truly helping or just helping themselves? From where I stand, it’s looking like the latter. What do you all think—are Harry and Meghan misunderstood philanthropists or royal grifters playing dress up? Sound off in the comments below and don’t forget to subscribe for more piping hot takes! Remember, in the game of thrones you either win or you fund your own propaganda tours. Stay woke out there, folks!