It seems that Meghan Markle’s latest attempt to cash in on the royal brand has hit yet another embarrassing roadblock. According to reports, QVC—the beloved shopping channel known for selling everything from kitchen gadgets to costume jewelry—has backed out of a collaboration with Markle. The jewelry she was promoting was reportedly of such poor quality that even QVC, which proudly hawks affordable trinkets to the masses, decided to pull the plug. And it gets worse: they are allegedly seeking compensation for their losses.

 

QVC is asking for its money back from Meghan. The whole debacle is laughable, to say the least. Meghan Markle, a woman once perched on the edge of royalty, reduced to selling knockoff, royal-inspired jewelry on TV—is this what it’s come to? The idea of her designing and selling anything resembling royal jewels is as ridiculous as it sounds. Can you imagine her in the aisles of Walmart, sifting through bins of plastic beads, sequins, and glitter, armed with nothing but a hot glue gun and an overinflated sense of self-worth? Because that’s the vibe this failed business venture gives off.

 

Rumor has it Meghan was given a hefty budget for this jewelry line—perhaps around £500,000—and, as many suspect, she probably spent a fraction of it on the actual jewelry while pocketing the rest. Why not? That’s just Meghan being Meghan, right? Her “consultancy fee,” let’s call it. Now, QVC, likely furious about being swindled by the Duchess, is lining up for compensation, joining the queue behind Spotify, Netflix, and Penguin Random House. Join the line, QVC—there’s plenty of grift to go around.

 

What makes this even more amusing is the comparison to Chelsea Davy, Prince Harry’s ex, who has quietly built a respectable jewelry brand. Chelsea, unlike Meghan, isn’t out there trying to convince the world she’s a royal or selling poorly made knockoffs. Her jewelry is top quality, reasonably priced, and—gasp!—actually well-designed. Imagine that. Meanwhile, Meghan’s offering up cheap imitations, presumably inspired by royal tiaras she’ll never wear. Because let’s be honest: the real stuff is reserved for the likes of Queen Camilla and Princess Catherine.

The joke practically writes itself. Meghan Markle, once the Duchess of Sussex, now unable to sell subpar jewelry on a TV shopping network. People joked about this scenario when “Megxit” first happened, but here we are—living the punchline. It’s almost poetic how swiftly she’s managed to ruin everything. Most people take a few decades to sink this low; Meghan did it in record time.

What’s even more tragicomic is the image of Meghan and Harry, desperate and deluded, standing on a set trying to sell royal-inspired knockoff jewelry to an audience of TV shoppers. Can you hear her now? “My husband’s grandmother wore something just like this to a state banquet,” or “Princess Diana adored tiaras that looked exactly like this one.” It’s all so absurdly entertaining.

But it wasn’t meant to be. Even QVC, that bastion of home shopping—though its standards are admittedly low—couldn’t clear the bar for Meghan’s goods. It’s no wonder the network pulled out. When even QVC doesn’t want to sell your products, you’ve hit rock bottom in the real world.

 

While Meghan’s QVC dreams have been dashed, Chelsea Davy is thriving. She’s announcing new collections and balancing life with a beautiful family. Chelsea’s pieces look elegant, timeless, and—shockingly—they actually exist. Meanwhile, Meghan, queen of cashing in on royal connections, can’t even manage to flog cheap trinkets without tanking the deal.

 

And yet, despite all these blunders, Meghan somehow keeps getting chances. Perhaps another QVC-level gig will come along. But for now, we can all sit back and enjoy the spectacle of Meghan Markle, rejected by QVC and sued for her shoddy craftsmanship.