Accused of Being a ‘Misbehaved Girl’ by My Boyfriend’s Mother for Ordering a Toy

This Lunar New Year, I may just end up being single. It’s not because of infidelity or any betrayal, but rather because I feel disrespected by my boyfriend’s family. If I were to marry him, I can already imagine the difficulties ahead. Please hear me out and offer some advice, as I’m feeling really down about this situation.

I’ve always been a rebellious person, a tomboy throughout school. I never wore my hair long or dressed femininely. The only time I wore a traditional dress was on graduation day when my grandmother bought me an expensive white ao dai. Only then did I wear it to make her happy. It wasn’t until I started working that I softened up a little, and my personality grew more gentle due to my work environment.

Currently, I’m a manager at a high-end restaurant. My job is demanding, but the salary is good enough for me to live comfortably in Hanoi. My friends always suggest I find a man to support me, but I’ve never liked relying on anyone. That was until four months ago, when out of the blue, I found myself in a relationship.

He’s a regular customer at my restaurant. Sometimes he dines alone, other times with a group. I made sure to reserve the best spot for him whenever he called ahead. He was elegant, courteous, and had a charming air about him, a typical Hanoi guy, which made me feel fond of him. Occasionally, when he stayed late, we’d chat for a bit, and I enjoyed the conversations. One night, he found my personal social media page and sent me a friend request. I was so flustered that I accepted right away.

He was incredibly thoughtful. He knew my working hours and would text me early in the morning or late at night after I finished work. One rainy evening, I was caught without an umbrella and had to wait at the restaurant for the rain to stop. Seeing my post about the rain, he quickly texted to check if I was still at work. When I replied with a simple “Yes,” he showed up with his car 20 minutes later to pick me up. I had no choice but to leave my bike at the restaurant and thank him for the ride.

I rented an apartment far from the city center to save on rent, so the trip home was always long. He asked why I kept my hair short and why I chose to be a manager instead of working in a bank, and his questions were always thoughtful and engaging, which kept the conversation going. When I sat in his car, I could smell his masculine cologne, and I couldn’t help but think, “I’m falling for him.”

After that night, he started paying even more attention to me. To avoid making me feel uncomfortable, he would park farther away when picking me up from the restaurant. Eventually, he confessed his feelings, saying he loved the way I looked in a shirt and trousers, with my short hair and bright smile. After four months, he invited me to meet his family during the mid-month Lunar holiday. Since his family lived far, he suggested I bring pajamas and stay overnight. I hesitated but agreed because he reassured me that his house was large and there was no need to worry.

Indeed, his family was well-off, living in a large villa in a quiet area near West Lake. His parents were elegant, and his siblings were welcoming, so I felt at ease. After dinner, I went to my room to relax and prepare for a date with him later. While scrolling through my phone, I came across an online shop selling a cute plush owl, big enough to hug while sleeping. I decided to order it as a gift for myself. I texted my boyfriend for his family’s address and arranged for the delivery. I got distracted and accidentally fell asleep.

The delivery man called, but I missed the call. He rang the doorbell and handed the package to my boyfriend’s mother. When she saw the package, she asked me to come downstairs to collect it. She started reading the delivery slip, which said “Con cú giả” (Fake owl). I didn’t get a chance to respond before she scolded me loudly.

“Oh my God, what is this? How could you be so shameless? I didn’t expect you to be like this. After staying in my house, you order such nonsense. A girl with no manners!”

To my shock, she threw the box straight into the trash. The family was in chaos, and when I picked up the box, I realized what had happened. The shop had printed the order slip without any punctuation, so the word “Con cú giả” (fake owl) read like something much more inappropriate.

I quickly explained to my boyfriend’s mother, opening the package to show them the plush owl. His siblings laughed, but my boyfriend was upset and told his mom she should apologize. However, she refused, still scolding me for buying such frivolous things when I was a guest in their home. I felt so hurt that I decided to leave immediately.

Even though I knew it was a misunderstanding, my boyfriend’s mother refused to apologize and continued to think I was a promiscuous girl who had been leading her son astray. When my boyfriend defended me, she scolded him as well. If this is how things will always be, how could I possibly marry into a family where the mother-in-law treats me this way? Would I have to endure such disrespect for the rest of my life?