As a family, we’ve always shared the ups and downs of life together. I had hoped that in my mother’s final years, we could continue that tradition, easing her burdens and making sure she lived out her days in peace. However, my sister-in-law’s actions have left me feeling disappointed and frustrated.

My mother was a strong woman, dedicated to her family and raising us, her children, with love and care. A few months ago, she suffered a stroke that left her bedridden. As the eldest daughter, I took it upon myself to ensure that she received the care she needed, working alongside my siblings to fulfill our responsibilities.

But life, as it often does, hasn’t been as smooth as I hoped, especially since my sister-in-law, who lives with my mother, has refused to share the burden of caregiving.

When my mother first fell ill, I thought our family would come together to support her. My brother lives far away and is often busy with work, so I understood his occasional absence. However, my sister-in-law, who lives under the same roof as my mother, seemed to avoid taking on her share of the responsibility. Instead, she pushed all the work onto me.

One evening after work, I visited my mother. As soon as I entered the house, I heard my sister-in-law calling from the kitchen, “You’re back? Mom’s been waiting. She needs help changing clothes. Could you do that for me? I’m busy cooking.”

Looking at my mother lying in bed, her cloudy eyes staring out the door, my heart grew heavy. I didn’t want to make things harder for my sister-in-law, but inside, I was filled with resentment. Didn’t she understand that I had a family of my own? That I had a job and responsibilities to my own children?

The situation reached a breaking point one weekend. I had just hosted my daughter’s birthday party when my phone rang.

“Hey, could you come over tonight and help take care of Mom? I’m going to a friend’s wedding and will be late,” my sister-in-law asked.

I felt a surge of frustration but tried to keep my voice calm. “Who’s with her now?”

“I’ve asked the neighbor to help for a bit. But could you come? Mom tends to get fussy at night, and she won’t sleep well. Just help me out,” she replied.

I hung up, feeling angry and resentful. My husband sighed, “Is this about your mom again? I know you care, but you also need to think about our family.”

That night, I went to my mother’s house. She took my hand and whispered, “My dear, I feel so bad. I don’t want to upset anyone, and I don’t blame anyone. I just want you all to get along and not fight over me.”

Her words squeezed my heart. I was torn between my duty to care for my mother and the life I had to live with my own family. I didn’t know how to balance both.

The next morning, I decided to sit down with my brother and sister-in-law for an honest conversation. I wasn’t trying to blame anyone; I just wanted us to find a solution together.

I said, “I understand that everyone has their own difficulties, but Mom is our mother. We can’t leave everything to just one person. If you’re busy, we can hire a caregiver, but we all need to share the responsibility.”

My brother nodded. However, my sister-in-law insisted that she would only take care of my mother during the week and that weekends were reserved for her family and personal time. Therefore, it was up to me to take care of my mother on weekends.

When I suggested hiring a professional caregiver, she balked at the high cost and expected me to cover it. I knew it wouldn’t be easy to change her mind, but her demands felt unreasonable and unfair.

I’m in a difficult position now. I don’t want our family to grow apart, but I’m overwhelmed by the pressure. I feel as though I’m being taken advantage of, and I don’t know what the best course of action is. Should I continue to bear the burden, or should I stand firm and demand a fair distribution of responsibilities?

The situation is weighing heavily on me, and I’m unsure how to proceed.