A Single Comment to My Mother-in-Law Got Me Kicked Out and Cost Me $700 a Month

I thought my words of encouragement were harmless, but the timing must have been wrong because they sparked an unexpected fury in my mother-in-law.

My mother-in-law is an incredibly hardworking woman who has always been dedicated to her family. She’s thoughtful, selfless, and deeply caring, always putting her children and grandchildren first. She’s never had conflicts with anyone and has always been admired for her humility and sense of fairness.

But ever since her health declined, confining her to the house and making mobility difficult, her personality has changed drastically. My father-in-law, who has always been a sharp and charming man, looks remarkably youthful for his 70 years. In contrast, my mother-in-law, despite being the same age, appears far older, and the contrast between them only seems to intensify her frustration.

While she struggles within the confines of four walls, my father-in-law is energetic and socially active. He exercises twice a day, joining local seniors for tai chi in the morning and cycling with middle-aged friends in the afternoon. When he isn’t working out, he’s often at a café playing chess and chatting with his buddies.

This lifestyle leaves him with little time at home. He only comes back for meals, a quick shower, and sleep. Since my mother-in-law became bedridden, my husband’s older brother hired me to care for her, paying me $700 a month. This arrangement allowed my father-in-law to continue his active social life without the burden of caregiving.

Every day, my father-in-law would briefly check in on her with questions like, “Have you eaten yet?” or “Do you need anything?” But his visits were fleeting, leaving her feeling neglected. She often worried aloud that he might be growing tired of her and suspected he might even have a romantic interest outside their marriage.

Her jealousy became a constant source of stress for me. She’d frequently ask me to call him and confirm his whereabouts, often insisting on video calls to ensure he wasn’t hiding anything. When he didn’t pick up, she’d demand I go out and find him. These suspicions and errands left me mentally and emotionally drained, but I always tried to comfort her with kind words.

One Wednesday, she was particularly weak, struggling to finish a bowl of soup. In an attempt to motivate her, I said jokingly, “Come on, eat up and get stronger, or else if anything happens to you, Dad might end up remarrying!”

The reaction was immediate and intense. She pointed her finger at me, shouting that I was disrespectful and cursing her to die so my father-in-law could remarry. Before I could explain or apologize, she ordered me out of the house, declaring she didn’t want me taking care of her anymore.

Despite my repeated attempts to apologize, she refused to forgive me. She even called her eldest son, demanding he find a new caregiver immediately. My brother-in-law, knowing how tough my other job was and appreciating the extra income I earned from caring for her, advised me to be patient and try to win her over again.

The next day, I tried to bring her lunch, but she refused to eat and insisted my father-in-law take care of her instead. However, he’s not someone who’s naturally inclined to caregiving, and it quickly became evident that he had no intention of adjusting his lifestyle to meet her needs.

I’m at a loss for what to do. My mother-in-law’s anger hasn’t subsided, and my attempts to make amends seem futile. Losing this caregiving job has not only impacted me financially but also emotionally, as I genuinely care about her well-being. How do I repair this rift and regain her trust?